I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize