my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
