You can't motorboat a personality
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
