And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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