what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
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