No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
