woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
