Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
