I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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