elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
My vagina is very pro this idea
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Randomize
