Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
