I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
