i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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