Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
