No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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