Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
