D3 body, D1 cock
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Randomize
