Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
