I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize