READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
