But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
She made me pour olive oil on her.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
