There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize