Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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