she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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