If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
