How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Randomize
