Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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