wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
