The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
the day after is always just damage control
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
