i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize