Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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