Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
