Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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