i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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