Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
