Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
