you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
