Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
