I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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