You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
