there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Someone signed my nipple.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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