This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
