I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
