we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
