quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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