its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
