i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
We're too hungover to prance.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
