Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
