I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
