school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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