I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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