as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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