i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
